# Military Humor

## 2438 posts in this topic

All science and speculation aside, here in Los Angeles there are deaths almost every year when idiots fire weapons into the air to "celebrate" certain holidays like the Fourth of July. These unfortunate consequences of such reckless behavior cannot be argued with.

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</span><table border="0" align="center" width="95%" cellpadding="3" cellspacing="1"><tr><td>Quote (bn880 @ 10 May 2003,03:42)</td></tr><tr><td id="QUOTE"></span><table border="0" align="center" width="95%" cellpadding="3" cellspacing="1"><tr><td>Quote (DarkLight @ 10 May 2003,05:32)</td></tr><tr><td id="QUOTE">It has been proven that a bullet that weights 9 gram and who leaves with a speed of 3000km/h (!!! and who has 3000J kinetical enery (sorry for the spelling and translation) and if the bullet gets fired in a 89Â° angle, the bullet will fall down about 100m away from where it was fired from, by then, the bullet will have lost a huuuge amount of it's energy and it will have only 30 J enery left. Â Enough to hurt you, but absolutely not enough to cause serious damage, so trust me just for this once, it won't kill you...

Once again, science has won...<span id='postcolor'>

This is a really bad conclusion, it is how the energy is dissipated that matters. Â The bullet is sharp has a small contact area, this "proof" has valid numbers, quite a heavy bullet, and proves that the terminal velocity of the bullet is 300Km/h, 1/10th of starting speed.

The problem is assuming a 9g lead object in the shape of a bullet doesn't travel through someones scull or torso (near neck). Â All the energy will be transferred into a single point, and no part of the human body takes that very well. Â Hit the right spot and you are toast.

EDIT: I was bored, check this out: Â http://perpetualbeta.com/woifm/archive/002290.html<span id='postcolor'>

"The .22 would hurt like hell and raise a lump on your skull. The larger rounds could kill you, and every year, some do. I *always* stay indoors on New Year's eve."

Found this on the link you gave, i suppose we'll just have to use this as a conclusion.... this guy does look like he knows a lot about it...

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We agreed that a higher velocity bullet could kill you, i dunno about a twenty two but why don't you try dropping a small bullet from 2 miles up on to your head?

I doubt it would be a clever thing to do

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1. Consider why its unadvised to drop coins off tall buildings

2. If a Naval ship ship fired 'rounds' its quite possible they were 14" shells. Considering a 14" shell is capable of inflicting considerable damage to a armoured battleship, imagine what it will do to a house. Even if it didn't go off, the weight of the shell would crush you to a pulp. I imgaine the idea was to fire star shells (Big flares) but someone fucked up and fired live rounds.

Ouch

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To discuss abour ballistics, please start another thread. current flow is going directly against intention of this thread - military STUPIDITY.

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That would be very unclever, firing rounds at a house.

Considering i would have a hard time lifting one of those things i doubt there would be anything left at all.

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Has this been posted before?

Bundeswehr ragtop

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</span><table border="0" align="center" width="95%" cellpadding="3" cellspacing="1"><tr><td>Quote (NurEinMensch @ 20 May 2003,15:07)</td></tr><tr><td id="QUOTE">Has this been posted before?

Bundeswehr ragtop

<span id='postcolor'>

ROFL

imagine the reaction of the CO when he saw what happened to his car.

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Has this been posted before?

Bundeswehr ragtop

Ahh... So that's how you Germans build your BMW 5-series cabriolets. :P

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Niiiiiccccceeeee! Who parked that thing out on the runway anyways?

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I'm sorry but I got no idea about the background story of that little accident, I just got the pics sent from a friend.

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Hehehe, great pic

Probable some guy who had to take a piss urgently so he just put his car somewhere and ran off, when he came back 5 minutes later, his whole life had changed

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This reminds me of the F-15 pilot who didn't appreciate getting a speeding ticket

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Haha I wonder how that happened.

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Hehe, seems like the pilot was blind and didn`t see the parked policecar.

Wait!! When are cars parked on runways...

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Famous last words quote: "Hey guys,wanna bet that i can drive under that F15?"

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Lol. Anyways whats up with military spending? We have this new jet unveiled and what do you think they're going to use it for? Do you think the government will let it sit like it should until its really needed or will they *cough* pick a fight for no reason just to test it out? Honestly a jet like that *cough* X35 *cough* should be great for another Pearl Harbor. That was like an entire air assualt without warning but the thing is did we need a new jet , or an entire new detection system. If you ask me the United States needs to work on detecting threats to the nation from abroad and I'm not talking spy work. I'm talking technological advancement towards electronic magnetic pulse weaponry.

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Lol tovarish, or like this

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Don`t drive drunk!

Don`t drive drugged!

Don`t drive while having sex!

Don`t drive how you learnt it in OFP!

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Christ, the other weekend I drove a HMMWV through an impact area on accident. No....not even I am immune to military stupidty....Yes I got my ass chewed. Although it might have helped if the NCOIC would have briefed me on what roads NOT to drive on and if he had given me a map. Of course it was all my fault because s\$^t rolls down hill.

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Quote[/b] ]Christ, the other weekend I drove a HMMWV through an impact area on accident.

Are there no signs, barriers or at least red markings to keep you off impact zones ?

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Quote[/b] ]Are there no signs, barriers or at least red markings to keep you off impact zones ?

On Ft. Bragg or any other major installation? Yes. On what is arguably the range with the fewest rules or restrictions located in the middle of nowhere Wyoming? No.

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Lol tovarish, or like this

I guess the Hummer didn't make the turn? Or was this a chicken contest?

Actually, both drivers had an equal chance at serious injuries if the speeds envolved were higher, the HMMWV would have flipped over...

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Sort of a Military story, definately stupid though...

I was living as a Student in Darlington up in the N.E, a smallish town best known for Trains and squadies coming from Catterick Garrison to mash it up with the local Inbreds.

My mate at the time was a big lad from High Wycombe who was heavily into drink and drugs, we got on like a house on fire.

We were out at Club Lucy's ( on Thursdays it was Free Entry and Å1 per pint ) and enjoying the effects of various substances mixing in our systems, propping the bar up, dancing intermittently, that kind of thing ...

My mate at one point comes back from the toilet and tells me some bloke just bumped into him with the usual "You looking at my Bird?" line, clearly trouble with the local inbreds is brewing...

So we're stood at the bar, when two lads, dressed in the local uniform of tracksuit bottoms and stripey jumpers start dancing in front of us, waving their arms about.

I saw one of their arms move towards my friends direction out of the corner of my eye, but didnt think much of it until my friend turned to me and told me that he thought he had just been punched.

This it has to be remembered is a big lad who liked Punk and was half out of his mind on alcohol and drugs.

A Punk from High Wycombe and a Catholic from Yorkshire, drugged and liquored up we were more than ready to stand our ground.

I expected further altercations but the two other lads just disappeared back into the crowd, so we resumed our bar-propping positions and carried on drinking.

Slowly over the course of the next few minutes I noticed that more and more people in the club were looking in our direction, and I dont mean a few, I mean a hundred or so, looking right at us.

This was not a good sign.

Thoroughly inebriated myself, I took myself off to the toilets, only to be accosted at the doors by one of the Club bouncers who kindly pointed out that if I turned around, I would see somewhere in the region of 50 Off-Duty Squadies all heading towards the toilets right behind me.

At this point I decided not to urinate, but to return to the bar where I collected my mate and made a beeline for the exit, where most of the squadies were also following.

Outside we took flight and I ran like I hadnt run in years, even my hefty friend showed a surprising turn of speed, luckily the club was only 500 yards or so from where we lived, so local knowledge of Alleys and backgardens saved our hides ( previous experience as a naughty teenager taught me that it is extremely valuable to know which gardens in your area had dogs in them, high fences or those infra-red flood light things ... ).

Funnily though, once I had set up a small trade route for illicit substances from Leeds ( in fairly short supply in Darlington ) we became good friends with all the Squadies at Lucy's, and they even took care of us during later altercations.

My mate never did stop staring at other peoples birds though.

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Today a military tank transporter went through intersection and APCs returning from Gulf went rolling into oncoming traffic at 70mph. I believe the tanks were being driven by a civvie contractor actually. Anyway 4 dead.

http://icwales.icnetwork.co.uk/0100new....-knifes